I love this time of year. I love the Christmas lights, music, family time, and all of the baking. You know what I don’t like? Setting unrealistically high expectations for myself to do all of the Christmas Traditions. It’s stressful and takes the joy right out of the holiday season for me. More and more, I’m realizing it is okay to say no to Christmas traditions.
If Christmas traditions stress you out. Say no.
If it costs too much money. Say no.
If it doesn’t bring you joy. Say no.
If your kids don’t care. Say no.
Instead, say yes to one or two things. Make those special and forget about the rest.
You don’t have to drive 2 hours away in matching pajamas to take pictures of your family cutting down their own live tree while sipping cocoa so you have the “perfect” photo opp. Unless this Christmas tradition genuinely brings you and your family joy, do not do it!
If the idea of waking up in the wee hours of the morning to make a mess with cocoa powder and marshmallows so your kid thinks their elf friend is having the best Christmas ever – don’t do it! (Also, here is a great list on what to tell your kids if you choose not to do Elf on the Shelf)
If the thought of baking cookies with your kids gives you anxiety and sets your OCD on overload. Do NOT DO IT.
SAY NO.
Say no to the over the top Christmas traditions if you want to. Say yes if you want, too.
I am saying NO to Christmas traditions that brought my stress last year. Specifically, The Kindness Elves. They were fun and I LOVE their message. But moving them and coming up with a different act of kindness for my kids each night was just too much. I’m not doing it. And you don’t have to either. Really.
The only Christmas Tradition I am 100% committed to this year is our Christmas Eve box. And that Christmas tradition might even get moved to Christmas Eve Eve depending on when we see extended family. Allowing myself the flexibility to just up and move one of our Christmas traditions is so freeing.
If you love the elf shenanigans or cutting down your own tree is amazing for you – that is awesome. Do it. Say yes.
My point is, you do you. Don’t play the comparison game this Christmas. It is okay to say no to Christmas traditions. This does not make you a bad mom. In fact, setting limits not only sets an amazing example for your kids. It makes you a good mom. Saying no to Christmas traditions can give your family a less stressful holiday season. Do it for you. Do it for them.
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I love Christmas and we have several traditions we do every year (making/decorating cookies, gingerbread house, live Christmas tree, advent calendar, etc etc) but I agree that the pressure to “do everything” and not let a single tradition go unfulfilled is ridiculous! It’s a season of joy and love, not stress and pressure. This article is a great reminder to get back to the reason for the season. (And PS thanks for linking to my Elf on the Shelf piece! That was a fun one to write.) MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Thank you. Thank you! This is just the reminder I needed today. I’ve been dying to do some of our Christmas traditions, but I can’t do them all this year with the 3 little ones. It’s too stressful!
Yes to all of this! We all need to give ourselves permission to refine, create and abandon traditions that may have worked but don’t anymore. We do the Elf on the Shelf because it brings the kids so much joy but as a result we have let go of other things such as trying to be at too many places and also having the same present for the kids every year (ornament, PJs, etc). I love the idea of the xmas Eve box. Enjoy your holidays